How Breastfeeding Led to Depression

Let me preface this by saying my experience was not the norm. It’s probably why it took me awhile before I realized why a normally good thing was the problem.

I felt exhausted but happy for the first two days after I gave birth. Then Little V started losing more weight than what the doctors considered normal. I was struggling with breastfeeding, but hey, most new moms do. Within 48 hours we had not one, not two, but three lactation consultants offer advice. Someone was always telling me something was wrong. The shape of my nipple. My baby’s latch. My baby had a tongue tie. But don’t worry, there were solutions to all these things so I could keep breastfeeding. I was constantly reminded that “breast is best.”

“I thought you just stick a baby on the boob,” said an exhausted Mr. Wonderful, who gallantly sat with me though every consultation and every feeding.

If only. It’s so natural for mama dogs and cows and horses; why couldn’t it be for me?

[Read more…]

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Ann Taylor Begonia Lace Tank and Vigoss Jeans

Ann Taylor Begonia Lace Tank

Mr. Wonderful and I actually got out for a second date post-baby today. Is it strange to say that half of my excitement for our lunch was an excuse to dress up a little? I was looking forward to wearing the Begonia Lace Tank I had recently ordered online from Ann Taylor.

I’m not typically a crop top type person (I haven’t had a flat stomach since high school), but it goes well with skirts if you’re not into tucking in blouses and want a bit of shape. I originally ordered the lace top to go with a high-waisted black silk skirt I own, but since we were eating at a low-key Thai restaurant for our date, I didn’t want to be overdressed. [Read more…]

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Being Okayest. Being True.

It’s my first Mother’s Day.

I haven’t written a post in awhile, and while the break during these last two months have been unintentional, I have started wondering about the course of this blog. What do I write about if my daily outfit nowadays consists of pajama bottoms, a Madewell tee (which is, by the way, the perfect, slouchy shirt), and an oversized cardigan?

Write about your new life right now, a friend suggested. About motherhood and the way you’re experiencing it.

It sounded so simple. And yet, I worried. Will writing about parenthood struggles and the everyday mundane feel relevant to my readers? Will people lose interest when I start talking about sleep deprivation, the challenges of breastfeeding and bloody nipples (yes, I said that), or struggling with postpartum depression? This is my life right now, but who would care?

My husband gave me my Mother’s Day gift this morning, a t-shirt that said, “World’s Okayest Mom.” It was not only a confirmation of who I am, but an affirmation that it’s ok to just be ok.

worldsokayestmom_1024x1024And I realized this: I never started a blog to garner lots of followers. It was always about sharing what was real and authentic to me, even if that came at a risk of being raw and off-putting. I may never have the greatest blog, just like I’ll probably never be the greatest mom. But that’s ok. As long as I stay true to me.

I hope you’ll stay around.

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Review of Rent the Runway Unlimited

cobaltvestWith the launch of Rent the Runway Unlimited this past week, I thought I’d quickly share my recent experience with the service while it was still in the beta program.

Despite the fact the new program wasn’t heavily publicized until now, I was put on the waiting list for ten months this past year. In fact, I had nearly forgotten about it until they contacted me two months ago while I was eight months pregnant. I asked customer service if I could wait until I had given birth and lost some weight. After all, why pay for an unlimited service when I would have a very limited selection due to my pregnancy?

[Read more…]

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Unpretty

Purple evening dress

This was the last dress I wore before I delivered Little V. My body was big, different and uncomfortable, but I remember loving how my bump looked and how the dress flowed and felt on me. There was still a sense of feeling attractive in a womanly way, as I carried a new life.

I write this post-partum as I’m wearing a pair of Depends.

[Read more…]

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The Arrival of Parenthood

NanetteLepore

Last week I made a trip to the hospital, expecting to get some IV fluids after a night of vomiting/diarrhea and then head back home for some much needed rest. Instead, I ended up delivering a baby girl 14 hours later! Little V arrived 3 weeks early, with all her fingers and toes (yes, I counted).

[Read more…]

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Sunday Sunday with Banana Republic

SundaySunday

It might be Valentine’s Day weekend, but Mr. Wonderful and I are opting to celebrate by lounging and relaxing at home. Every spare day is becoming precious, with the knowledge in the back of our minds it could possibly be our last one together with just the two of us.

Though Banana Republic launched its Sunday Sunday lounge collection a little over a year ago, I only discovered it a few months back. This cozy mint sweater has accommodated my growing stomach nicely, and is the perfect layer to throw on over a fitted shirt. It’s been one of my go-to pieces, but only recently did I realize I never took a photo of it for my blog!

[Read more…]

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Something Old and Something You

Leopardblouse I had to attend a work event recently, and felt completely uninspired as I stared at the rotation of five tops I wear on a weekly basis. Striped shirt, gray tee, black tee, black tank, black long-sleeved shirt. I considered the red dress I wore in my last post, but I knew it would be far too dressy.  

I had long taken what was maternity-friendly out of my closet and hung them onto a clothing rack for simplification purposes. Opening my closet door and staring at my complete wardrobe again felt like a foreign act, though it was only a mere six months ago that I was still able to wear most of these clothes. Old friends, I thought, will any of you take me back?

[Read more…]

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The One-Size-Fits-Most Red Dress

Tees by Tina lighter

In the world of black dresses, a red one is extremely hard to find. Mr. Wonderful loves it when I wear red (and who doesn’t remember Julia Roberts’ fantastic version in Pretty Woman? Or Audrey Hepburn in Funny Face?), but even in pre-pregnancy I only owned a few pieces. [Read more…]

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Third Trimester Reflections

Cape

It’s hard to believe I’m already in my third trimester, and that in less than two months my life will be unalterably changed. Will she be born with wispy hair and the same boyish looks as I had? Will she take after Mr. Wonderful and have the same triple chin he had as an infant?

Pregnancy has given me added respect to every woman who has gone through this before me. Especially those who have jobs where they stand on their feet all day, or already have other kids to chase. As I prop up my sausage-like swollen feet and legs in front of me while I work at my computer, I wonder, how did you all do it?

I didn’t believe anyone when they told me, but it’s true – first trimester is now a distant memory. I vaguely remember my body being physically miserable and mentally challenged, but I wouldn’t be able to describe it to you anymore. [Read more…]

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